XBOX ONE Edition lacking an Add server button

I know this isn't a bug as such, but it is definitely something that affects the game quite majorly for me and my friends, I used to operate solely in a realm with a few friends, but now a realm is definitely not suitable as the world size and players in said realm now causes lag that makes the game almost unplayable. So I created a dedicated external server as an alternative, without realising there is no direct option for the people on an xbox one to join. I have used back door methods of changing DNS servers on xboxs themselves, but that doesn't work for all players and is an awful lot of steps to do something that should be available anyway. 

Basically, a realm is no longer a viable option for a dedicated server, due to Mojang servers not being able to cope, and xbox players not having an Add Server button severely limits the accessibility of about 8-9 players on an external server.