When I placed sand two blocks above a torch, it passes right through the torch and hits the ground. The same thing happens with gravel, but I haven't tested it with anvils.
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This is correct (see here for details). The sand is only intended to turn into a resource block if it lands on, for example a torch. On a completely unrelated note, you should consider updating your java, as your present version is severely outdated.
cannot confirm. works fine for me (single player, mc 1.4.5, win 7 x86, java 1.6.0_24). have you placed the torch on the ground or one above it? the sand/gravel/anvil will only become an item if the torch is on the ground or on the side of a block on that level.