What is supposed to happen-
I hit play and the game launches
what actually happens-
"Minecraft launcher has stopped working- A problem caused the program to stop working. Please close the program."
Everything i do recreates the problem, i cant get it to stop
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You may need to reinstall the locally installed files that Minecraft puts into place. To do so, press your Windows+R keys, type in %AppData% at the dialog, and press Enter. In the window that appears, open the .minecraft directory, and delete everything except for the saves directory that you see therein. Then, try running Minecraft again. Please report back if this fixed your issue or not.

It didn't work; however, a full reinstall of Minecraft (deleting .minecraft from roaming and running MinecraftInstaller.msi from the website) seems to have worked so far. This solution is really frustrating because I now have to reinstall all my versions and servers

correction, even with a full reinstall it doesn't seem to launch
every once in a blue moon after trying to launch it 15+ times it randomly launches but i have to keep trying or it will just keep crashing