The realms server will close as soon as an item, shot by a dispenser, goes through a portal. It will say "Server closed." and then on consecutive tries the message "java.couldnotconnect" will display. The realm will only then be joinable if the owner gets a backup. The issue does not seem to happen when an item is thrown through a portal by hand, however.
It only seems to happen the first time something is thrown into a Nether portal. See MC-73866